near death?

Well....today I almost died!! Ok, so maybe I just passed out, but it was so weird!

Oh I was just having an average day...class, breakfast, test, and then I went to give blood (because people need it!!), and it was going well. I had a great time chatting with the guy that took my vitals and poked my finger (even though he hurt me bad). He was so sweet and we shared a love for psychology :) Then I went and sat down and waited on my nurse to get all the stuff ready to draw out the five pounds of blood....

{i really was excited! haha}

Ok so my lovely nurse came back and got me all  hooked up! P.S. that needle is HUGE! I was feeling great, my blood was flowing speedily out of my arm and into the bag

{sick, I know...thanks Lyss for the picture though!}

Ok so then I filled up my entire bag, and was feeling wonderful! The nurse proceeded to take the big fat needle out of my arm and told me to hold my arm in the air. As soon as I lifted my arm into the air, I got really dizzy, so I told my nurse and she elevated my feet and put ice bags under my neck and on my stomach (She didn't hesitate to lift my shirt right on up in front of everyone! Thanks, lady...i'm not the smallest person ever!). Anyway, I could feel myself blacking out, and then the next thing I know, I opened my eyes and was so confused!! There were 3 nurses/whatever they are all hovered around me and I had no idea where I was! I honestly felt like I had died and came back to life! I know that sounds dramatic, and it is I guess, but it was just the weirdest feeling ever! They were asking me if I was okay, and I couldn't even answer them because I was so confused! After about a minute of me looking at them with probably the most hilarious face ever, I said "yes, I'm okay!" Then I kind of laughed because I couldn't believe I just passed out! I've given blood multiple times and this has never happened! But anyway...I got some nutter butters and powerade out of the whole deal so I guess it was worth it ;)

But seriously, it was so scary! It's all worth it though because with my blood, 3 people's lives could be saved! I mean, I almost lost mine, but...who cares? :) I love to think about the fact that there might already be people walking around with my blood in their body! It's so awesome that I am healthy enough to be able to give that much blood!  Hopefully soon 3 more people will be healthy/ more healthy than they were because of my blood! 

{not to mention I got my infamous XL t shirt!!}

[don't I look like I've lost weight? ha]

Since I was supposed to take it easy, and I needed a "hearty meal" (so my nurse said), my sweet roommate Alyssa cooked me up some delish food :)

{thanks, lyss!! You're the best!}

Crazy day....but hopefully someone else's crazy day will end better because of my blood! Thank you, Jesus :)

blessings

My family is big, loud, obnoxious, hysterical, and so beautiful! Honestly, I cannot think of anyone that I would rather spend time with than my family. I guess we're not your average family....we all get along so well (most of the time :) and now I feel like we're pretty much all the same age! My siblings are my best friends. I think they are the most hilarious people in the world! Even after being with them for only a little while, my stomach will hurt from laughing so hard. I think maybe that's why I don't think very many people are funny...because I grew up around hilariousness!! I have the best time when I'm with my family! Just thinking about going home for thanksgiving makes me unbelievably giddy :) The Lord has blessed me beyond belief!

{love my sibs}

{best parents ever}

[no, those jeans dont fit anymore...it's whatever]

This summer at the children's home one night, I had a little bit of a breakdown. I felt terrible. I began thinking about how much I loved all the kids/teenagers there and I couldn't even fathom their parents not feeling the same way. I think it's safe to say that nearly every one of those kids has something terrible going on with their home lives and that's why they're there. My heart was completely broken. These kids did nothing to deserve this. Then I began thinking about my family....and I was actually upset. I felt really guilty because I have such a wonderful family. I didn't understand why God chose to give me such an amazing family and not them. I did nothing to deserve my family. I am so blessed. I still don't understand why God chose to give me such a wonderful Christian family, but I am beyond thankful. I'm also so thankful that God called me to this ministry. Maybe he gave me such a good family and this calling because I am supposed to be that stability and loving person that the children need in their lives. I started to realize that when my 2-year old angel started calling me "mom" this summer. Broke my heart to leave him. I'm sure he'll grow up and not remember me at all, but...he changed me forever! I'm so thankful!

{my o'dell}

Don’t know how it is You looked at me
And saw the person that I could be
Awakening my heart
Breaking through the dark
Suddenly Your grace

Like sunlight burning at midnight

Making my life something so

Beautiful, beautiful

Faith Like Mary's

This morning I started my day off (at 2:00pm :) ) by doing what I should do every day...reading my Bible and doing a little devotion by Charles Spurgeon (which can be read here ). This morning my Bible reading was in Luke 1 which just talked about the angel coming to tell Elizabeth and Mary that they would be having sons. I have read this passage many times, but today Mary's faith was even more evident and inspiring to me! (Perhaps because of the place I am in my life right now!)  So, for those of you who don't know, the angel comes and tells Elizabeth's husband that they're going to have a baby and he does not believe it because Elizabeth is so old. Anyway, when the angel Gabriel goes to tell Mary that she will have Jesus, apart from asking how she will have a baby because she is a virgin, the only thing that Mary says is "I am the Lord's servant, and I am willing to accept whatever he wants. May everything you have said come true."

 Umm hello, Mary...your faith is astonishing! Notice how she didn't ask many questions, she didn't start freaking out or worrying about how people were going to treat her or what Joseph was going to think of her, about how young or incapable she felt, or anything! Actually, when she talks to Elizabeth a little later in the chapter she tells her this:

  “Oh, how my soul praises the Lord.
    How my spirit rejoices in God my Savior!
    For he took notice of his lowly servant girl,
      and from now on all generations will call me blessed.
  For the Mighty One is holy,
      and he has done great things for me.
  He shows mercy from generation to generation
      to all who fear him.
  His mighty arm has done tremendous things!
      He has scattered the proud and haughty ones.
  He has brought down princes from their thrones
      and exalted the humble.
  He has filled the hungry with good things
      and sent the rich away with empty hands.
 He has helped his servant Israel
      and remembered to be merciful.
 For he made this promise to our ancestors,
      to Abraham and his children forever.”

I love how she's so excited and feels so blessed almost immediately upon being told she is pregnant! How I desire faith like Mary's! Mary is blessed for believing that God will do what he says! He has promised to take care of us and in His word it says that he came to give us life to the fullest, but for some stupid reason, I still worry and doubt so much!

Next time I’m faced with a challenge or an unknown, I pray to respond as Mary did:

“I am the Lord’s servant, and I am willing to accept whatever he wants…”

Lame-o

Hey guess where I am!! Oh my gosh you're right....in my room....on a Friday night. Man, I'm crazy!! You know who's even more crazy??! My roommates....who are all currently getting ready for bed......oh my. (My goodness, that was bad grammar!) I need some craziness in my life!

Ok but seriously, I don't know why I don't get invited to all these fun parties going on around me....

If only everyone knew I would make their party they would so invite me :)

On another note, I was supposed to go home today...and to watch my STCH kids play football. However, I did not. I'm pretty/really sad about it, but sometimes things just happen! I can't wait for thanksgiving! Hopefully me not going home this weekend will just make thanksgiving much more fun!!

Last night was the "UA Drive-In Movie". I thrive off of events like this! They make me so happy! I was in charge of making sure everyone (but myself, of course!) only took one piece of candy...and I had the time of my life doing so! I love people...I love meeting new people, talking to them, making jokes about them, and just having a good time! I love events! I wish we could have one every day---so collegiate :) I even took a picture with the maintenance man, Buck! Hahahah

My life as an almost college graduate!

As you can see, in March I decided that I was going to start blogging...........and it's October. Fantastic. I don't understand why I find it so difficult to sit down and write a blog! Deep down I really want to! So, I'll say it one more time and hopefully this time it will be true....I'm going to start blogging! Not because I care that everyone knows how i'm feeling, but because I want this for myself...I think it will be good for me.

Now where do I even start.....

I'll start by summing up my life right now--my feelings, my plans, etc... :)

Right now I'm sitting in my room, with my hair in a high messy bun with my pink robe on (shout out to my sis Abby--love this robe!), pretty much bored to death. Welcome to my life recently. You can probably find me sitting in my room on my computer most nights of the week! Lame, i know! Especially because this is my last semester of college!! Speaking of college, all of my classes are beyond easy, and I'm not that bright of a student, so that's saying a lot! I have honestly made above an 95 on all of my tests this semester....and I haven't really studied. It's a little bit ridiculous! Sometimes I feel like I get more stupid instead of smart by going to class. I'm done with all of my Psych classes (which i LOVED), so now i'm just trying to get all my hours in! My graduation is December 18th!! Only a few more months! Mark your calendars :) I'm so excited to be a college graduate, but I'm also nervous/sad. I'm completely dreading trying to find a job, but I'm completely stoked about finding one and getting to wear cute dress clothes to work :) I'm sad because I love ETBU. I love being a college student. Thinking about the fact that I will never get to be an undergrad again is sad. Late nights, multiple naps in the middle of the day, lots and lots of people around you that are your age--these are all things I know I will miss a lot! But I am excited to move on, and very grateful that I even got to come to ETBU!

My future is what worries me. I'm a big worrier! If there is an unknown, I worry about it. As you can imagine right now, my life is filled with unknowns! What's in store for me after graduation? If I get a job, will it pay me enough to live on my own? Am I too big of a scaredy cat to live alone? Will anyone even hire me in the first place? Am I supposed to get married soon? Should I go to grad school? Am I doing just what I want or am I listening to what God is trying to tell me? Questions, questions, questions!!

Ideally I would love to get a job doing some kind of social work with children. God has placed inside of me a passion for kids who do not have a good home life, and I think for me to ignore that would be horrible. I know God gave me this passion for a reason, so I know he will faithfully carry out his plan in my life, and I strongly believe he will include these kids in it. But for some stupid reason, I just have a difficult time sitting back and watching. God has proven himself faithful time and time again and I still have a difficult time! This past summer, He totally provided a way for me to work at the South Texas Children's Home! Seriously...you can see the hand of God in every detail of how I got the job! It was amazing to see, and I had the time of my life this summer! He definitely re-affirmed that calling in my life, and I'm so thankful! Here are a few pics from my summer:

This is probably the most boring blog post of all time. Sorry if anyone actually took time to read it.

I guess to sum up everything, I will be waiting, praying, listening, and enjoying my last few months

of college! Oh, and blogging :)

Peace and blessings, peace and blessings!

Ok, so...to all of you non-ministry formations friends that have been reading this blog, I just want to apologize for the boringness and tell you that I had to make a blog for class and my professor gave us assignments of questions that we had to answer on our blog. Hence, my not fun blog :)

However, I'm sure you will be excited to hear that I'm going to try to start blogging on my own! Yay for no assigned blogs :) Here are a few reasons why i've decided to start:
1. I think this is a crazy time of my life that I'll want to remember forever
2. I can hardly remember anything (i.e. what i did this morning), so I thought maybe writing it down would be nice for me, and perhaps sharpen my memory skills!
3. I love reading other people's blogs (shout out to the beautiful Fari Thomas and my lovely sis Abby).
4. Blogging seems super trendy, and well...I need a little assistance in that area
5. I basically just want to be just like Abby and Fari :)

So...cheers to my first fun (slash wanna be fun) blog!

easiest and hardest

The rule that is easiest for me is "the desire to disparge." I love praising others and making them feel good about themselves. I don't think that anyone needs to be feeling down about themselves because there is something great about everyone! I love pointing that out to them and hopefully boosting their self-esteem! On the contrary, the rule that is the hardest for me is "focus on your strengths." So often I think negatively of myself, and don't look at the things that the Lord has blessed me with the talents or abilities to do. I always just focus on my weaknesses.